February 06, 2012

Sorry in Advance...

I planned on posting today, I really did.  I was going to get the post up late... but it was going to be here.  It's scheduled for tomorrow.  Truth is, I just haven't felt like it lately.  I have been having a BLAST taking photos to stockpile for when I'm doing this Bare Naked Nail challenge, but I really don't want to write the posts.  It comes down to two things:

1) I've been sick.  Not so much sick as in pain.  I have TMJ and thought I'd been having a flare up because I was having trouble eating and what-not, but now the rest of my face and neck are starting to swell and I'm having pain in other areas.  Besides being on pain killers all the time, it's making me very tired.  I've been putting off going to the doctor because I was SURE that it was just my jaw and it would clear up.  Plus, I don't have insurance anymore.  I can't afford to be sick!  Mom is going to pay for me to go to the doctor tomorrow, though.  It has to be done.  Hopefully I'll be back up soon!

2) I haven't said anything, but I struggle with anxiety and depression.  They egg each other on.  I've been doing a lot better in this past year, but lately it's hit me kind of hard.  Without going into details, my problems really started when my grandpa died, and I can't seem to get away from it.  It was almost six years ago, and like I said, I'm mainly better.... but I have my bad times too.  I just happen to be stuck right now.  I've also been getting hit with dreams and memories of my friend's mom that died when we were little.  I miss them both so much, and I'm kind of just holding on to what's happening.  I'm not letting it drag me down as much as it has in the past, because these memories rarely come to me anymore.  See?  I'm improving.  I'm finding good from the bad.  :)  YAY!  lol

So, if I miss a post here and there, I apologize.  I try to stay on schedule since I don't post at all on weekends anymore, but sometimes it just doesn't happen.  And I know that a lot of you say it doesn't matter if I don't post blahblah, but you really notice your numbers drop when you miss a day and it gets discouraging.  I had always thought it was stupid of bloggers to apologize, but I think that's part of it.  You don't post for a day, your readership drops by half and you think you've pissed everyone off!  lol

Anyway, I didn't mean for this to be so lengthy, or anywhere near as personal as it is, but now you know. I won't go anywhere, but posts may not be at the same time everyday like they used to be.  Thanks so much for sticking around through everything!  I love you all!  Thank you to the new followers, as well!  Sometimes I feel like I'm not growing as I should, then I remember that I post quality content (as far as I'm concerned), and I don't bribe or buy my followers, and I feel good about each and every one of you!  I really do love you all.

Thanks so much if you read all this!  New post tomorrow!  Promise!  <3

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry to hear about what your going through but I'm glad your able to have such a positive outlook. Get well and feel better!!!!


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